eat the whole grapefruit.

half-surrender isnt possible.

either you're fully surrendered to God or you're not surrendered at all.

surrender is just not one of those things you can do half-way.

you could be half-sincere in your prayers.
you could half-trust God with your future.
shoot, you could even eat half a grapefruit.

but you cant half-surrender your life to God.

granted, its possible to surrender some areas of your life to God, and not others, but seriously.. is that really surrender?

NOPE.

half-surrendering your life to God is like taking half a shower.

stupid.

and very difficult to do entirely sane.

i could elaborate on that metaphor if you wanted me to; say something about how, just as you have to take all your clothes off in order to take a full shower and be completely clean, so we too must "strip" ourselves of anything that is hindering us of entirely surrendering to God...

i have a feeling though that the expounding of that metaphor would be purely for my own entertainment, and wouldnt necessarily get the point across any better.

besides, im not really trying to get a point across. this isnt a Bible study or a class assignment. This is just me processing.
processing the sudden realization that, even though i would claim to be fully surrendered to God, im not really, because when i really stop and think about it, there are several areas of my life that i afraid to fully surrender over to God.

becuase, after all, full surrender means that Grace no longer has control.

Grace isnt always comfortable with that.

of course, Grace also talks about herself in third person, so maybe you shouldnt really trust anything Grace has to say.

im getting off track.

all im trying to say is, if you're going to fully surrender your life to Christ, you cant keep holding a peice of it back. even a tiny little peice. because the truth, as i have recently been punched in the face with, is that whatever little tiny peice of your life you're refusing to surrender to God, is going to cause major problems when you come around to the point of wanting to deepen your relationship with Him. that little tiny peice will HUGELY hinder the ability with which you approach the throne of grace, longing to be held by the Prince of Peace.

it hurts a little, because life can get a little sour sometimes, but i have a feeling that, once you let go of that tiny little peice, and stop trying to half-surrender yourself to Christ, the result will be oh so sweet.

go ahead, eat the whole grapefruit.