maybe, just maybe.

maybe im not cut out to be a counselor.

everytime i encounter someone needing advice, its like i just looked at myself in a giant mirror. a giant mirror exposing my every downfall. I advise someone about their situation, and im left sitting there convicted by my own words. I hear myself talking to someone about what they need to change in their life, and meanwhile i'm feeling like the hugest hypocrite in the world.

just a little overwhelming.

i tell the impatient to wait for God's perfect timing.... guess what my biggest struggle is?

i tell the self-pitying to count their blessings... guess what i have a hard time doing?

i tell the weak in heart to rely on Gods strength... guess what i need to start doing?

i tell the insecure to find their significance in God... guess where i need to place my own significance?

turns out, i should probably be learning the very same things as everyone else.

and i wonder why, at the end of the day, i have a hard time putting my finger a single lesson i have learned. i wonder why it feels like i am always learning about 7 and a half billion things at once. i wonder why i am on lesson overload.

maybe if i would start listening to my own advice.

maybe i would learn what it means to wait for Gods timing, and not just say i am. but really, truly, trust that God's timing is perfect.

maybe i would realize just how blessed i truly am. how silly it is for me to sit and feel sorry for myself.

maybe i would discover a new-found strength to make it through the day. perhaps even find that peace that passes all understanding.

maybe i would stop placing my significance in others, or my own accomplishments. stop being insecure in who God has created me to be. fully recognize my significance; as a child of God.

but maybe, just maybe, its good that i dont have it all together. maybe its good that i am forced to give the advice i need to hear. maybe its good that i am being convicted by every word that comes out of my mouth. maybe its good that i am on lesson overload. because clearly, i have a little to learn.

afterall, who wants to hear advice from someone who has all the answers. psh... not i.

maybe God wants to use a silly little counselor like me.